PR mission

PR is a scam: desperate glittery-eyed, perky-voiced fucks peddling the excrement of exploited and deluded and doomed special-needs, provincial hair-gel freaks. Speak to a pr tramp, listen to the insulting lack of sincerity. There isn’t enough napalm in the world for these bottom-feeders.

So when we say we do pr, it’s not what you think. You won’t find us begging fake journalist to embed a clip from a reality show. No, we’ll cut those mutherfuckers, we’ll find them and see to it they never walk again, we’ll hire crackheads to bum their whole families. So we don’t do that, we do stunts and scams. We were the ones got rid of the Cambodian land mine and stray dogs in one fell dog food swoop. We made the pink Volvos. We ratted out Mark Thatcher. We honey-trapped the health minister. We bummed the priests. We wrote the forbidden ice-cream jingle. We poisoned the well. And we’d do it all again.

PR services - -