We've been asked to look at the bottled water situation and are happy to do it because this scam has been running long enough. We've had a think and come up with flatpack 1 litre bio-degradable cartons, which are sent out to our distributors/franchise dudes. They fill them up with tap water and put them in our provided extra-chilly fridge vending machines. They then charge, like, 50p for a litre of icy water. The money to pay for all the kit comes from advertising spots on the side of the cartons. So the water is an ad channel and will generate maximum exposure on trains and planes. We expect resistance and dirty tactics from the pirates in charge, i.e. airports and train stations. That's right WHSmith, your racketeering days are numbered. We're gonna plow our profits into expensive lawyers to fuck you if you even look at us funny. If anyone wants a franchise machine then holler to our client on this one, Tetrapack. Stay firm blap blap.
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